Suicide, Time of Death, 20:53

My dearest friend FICKLE has just commited Bloggercide.

He is no more.

No more FICKLE.

Gone.

...

I'm sure someone out there cares.

I'm glad I was Baptized

There is a God.

A cruel vengeful God who creates snow and sub-zero temperatures in a normally mild climate so I don't have to go to school for 2 extra days.

I bet Tiny Tim is rolling over in his freezing, Christmas-Dinnerless grave.

Filled with snow.

Thyming

When you're talking, timing matters.

Like, a lot.

Angelina Jo-Lee

Angelina juhlee

Joe. Lee.

How do you say it.

I doubt Angelina knows.

A Good Deed On New Year's Eve

I don't know where you are, but it's New Year's Eve here... sort of.

It's 20 to 1 in the morning, but that's New Year's Eve enough for me!

Anyway, my good deed was to help a poor depressed girl, recognise her full potential.

As I was surfing the internet, looking for cheap mercenaries to aid me in my co'up, I came across this poor girl.



Staring into the cold, unforgiving eyes, I felt my soul enshrouded in darkness, and an unstoppable urge to write angry poetry about how my parents hate me.

Luckily my will power won out.

I decided this girl needed a makeover, and with the help of paint and a lot of patience, I turned her from a depressed sociopath, into...



An obviously happy, chipper prostitute!

Now, one may wonder what made me pick this subject to blog about. A very simple reason. A Fringe as large as that, can cause blindess. After a very long arguement with F.I.C.K.L.E. (see first post for link) about dyeing hair purple or orange, we ending up on fringes. And I figured that...

How would you shower with that fringe? The shampoo would slowly trickle down towards the eyes until...

Fast forward 20 years and you're either blind, or covered in your own filth due to fear of showering.

Fringes are fatal.

At least when I'm Supreme Overlord, there will be a limit on the amount of hair you can have.

The rest must be used to feed the hungry orphans I intend to send to work in the mines.

Otherwise there won't be enough diamonds to furnish my Dream-Castle in the Sky.

So anyway, do you think (I named Fringe-girl Vicky) Vicky looks better as a sociopath or prostitute?

Opinions!

A Post That Isn't About Christmas

Everyone has been posting about Christmas.

Even me, as my past three posts had Christmas in the title.

So does this one, but that doesn't count.

Lets refresh ourselves and get past Christmas, as cruel and bitter as it may seem, and focus on the next big holiday, New Years!

I understand today was Stephen's Day, and that should hold a special place in my heart, but frankly, its about time I had a holiday named after myself.

Anyways, with everyone posting left right and centre about Christmas, I figured I'd post about New Year. Not the most creative way to be different, but I'm sleepy, full of chocolate and turkey, and left my brain, along with the remote, on the other side of the room.

I think today is Saturday, but the newspapers are speaking in terms of Eves, Days and Stephens, so I can't be sure. Anyway, it's not like I can go anywhere with the roads covered in ice. Soon I may develop cabin fever, and you may see about my festive exploits on the news.

This post was a perfect example of how not to do it. I should of thought before writing. But its the day after Christmas, and those of you who aren't face down outside a bar know what I'm feeling right now. Lazy, sleepy, and lethargic. So, forgive my festively confusing ramblings, and go and sleep.

Or watch It's a Wonderful Life

Whichever is easier.

Wishing Everyone a Merry Christmas

Sort of, it's more to help my laziness

This entry isn't to talk about me, for once. Thats a difficult concept to grasp, so bear with me :(

After deciding to tear myself away from daytime television, chocolate and the warmth of the fire, I thought I should wish everyone a Merry Christmas here. But there's so many people with so many blogs, and so little time before my patience runs out and I return to the fire to curl up. Then the guilt will set in and I'll run back to the computer, and take another stab at the blog before becoming cold and returning to the fire.

Sort of like an epileptic cat.

So, to Hannah Miet, Brenda, LoveLittleRed, miss carly, christina, HalfCrazy, Ciaran, and Anonymous, I wish you all a Merry Christmas!

For those who were too selfish to comment, you know who you are :P

I wish everyone out there on Blogger, and the world, a very Merry Christmas, and a very Happy New Year.

Now that that kindess is out of the way, I can go back to standing awkwardly in the kitchen, smelling the turkey in the hopes someone will feed me.

I'm not a dog.

I swear.

Shell Shocked... on Christmas

I am shocked.

I'm more than shocked.

I'm that fuzzy feeling you get inside when you buy something really expensive, spending all your money on it, and despite the fact your broke, still being happy because of what you bought.

Sort of like if was on cocaine, only without the pain in my nose.

I would just like to thank everyone who followed and commented, I never expected that anyone would actually read this thing! But now I have this huge crushing pressure to deliver, so I'd like to make some New Year's Resolutions, without sounding too chuffed with myself. Which I am anyway.

1. I promise to blog every day over the holidays, and at least once a week once... school... starts again. Icky exams :(

2. I promise to keep my blog interesting, and funny, based on your comments.

3. I do read you're comments! They make me happy and warm in my heart!

4. All who comment will be spared when I implement my new world order.

I'd also like to apologize for lack of a real topic on this post! I could lie and say I don't have an interesting life, but everyone here knows thats not true.

The truth is I'm just blown away by the feedback! So, after promising to read all comments, help me out! What would YOU like to hear my blog about? What parts do you love? What do you hate?

Maybe focus more on the love part. Administer hate in small doses.

Until tomorrow! While you wait you can stitch my face onto flags or something.